It is nearly impossible, when you're young, to imagine having an adult child. Funny how we can get caught up in the everyday happenings and then suddenly the years have gone by--and then "now" is a lot later than we thought. Now, I would have to say, without a doubt, having the relationship I do with my son is the richest experience in my life.
It wasn't easy for me being a Mom. As a single parent for most of his life, I found myself overwhelmed with all the different hats I was required to wear to raise a child alone. Working and providing stability, doing all the domestic chores, keeping up with schoolwork and activities and creating a nurturing, loving home was all challenging for me. I did my best but always wished that I had more time and energy to just "be" with him.
Living right across the street from me now is a couple with a 4 year old daughter. The mother stays home with her. It is amazing to me to see them sitting outside under a tent making pretend cakes and cookies, playing a board game in the grass, or spinning around on the sidewalk with arms outstretched. I am in awe watching them at the pace of their very mellow, loving lives.
I wonder how this little girl will be when she becomes an adult? Having two parents who are actually attentive to you must be quite extraordinary. The closest experience I have to this is the time I spent with my Great Aunt when I was a child. Even though I wasn't the only one there, it was calm, nurturing and fun. I remember it seemed timeless as we would put puzzles together, play cards, or wash little rocks in the sunshine to see them sparkle. It was quiet and inclusive, unlike being at home which felt tense and out of control.
Somehow, I am sure my mothering sprang from many variables and was a combination of different experiences throughout my life. As I look back today, I only have a fuzzy perspective on how fast the time flew by and how we got to now. My son is thirty-two and lives in another state so we have to depend on phones, email, scype and carefully planned visits to stay in touch.
What I appreciate most about our communication is it's honesty and caring. I see in him a person who is sensitive, creative, cares about other people and his work or whatever he is doing, and has the ability to be totally present and in the moment. He is truly a wonderful man. (You might feel I'm biased but I'm trying to be objective in my subjectivity!) He has a very full life, having become a father this year. His values around parenting are interesting to see and are clearly reflected in the quality of involvement he has with his daughter and wife, which is so sweet to see and be around.
I like him. Not only because he is my son, but because of who he is as a person. We talked on the phone over the weekend. He was positive and supportive about my life and the projects I'm involved in. I was able to ask him for some reflection and he took the time to give me input as well as relating it to his own experiences and journey. The honesty was astounding.
Being the parent of an adult child is delightful to me. I am so grateful that I am a Mom and a Granny. The relationship I have with my son is healthy, giving, and nurturing. It is all of the things I had hoped for when he was growing up. I feel very blessed to have this story to tell.
It wasn't easy for me being a Mom. As a single parent for most of his life, I found myself overwhelmed with all the different hats I was required to wear to raise a child alone. Working and providing stability, doing all the domestic chores, keeping up with schoolwork and activities and creating a nurturing, loving home was all challenging for me. I did my best but always wished that I had more time and energy to just "be" with him.
Living right across the street from me now is a couple with a 4 year old daughter. The mother stays home with her. It is amazing to me to see them sitting outside under a tent making pretend cakes and cookies, playing a board game in the grass, or spinning around on the sidewalk with arms outstretched. I am in awe watching them at the pace of their very mellow, loving lives.
I wonder how this little girl will be when she becomes an adult? Having two parents who are actually attentive to you must be quite extraordinary. The closest experience I have to this is the time I spent with my Great Aunt when I was a child. Even though I wasn't the only one there, it was calm, nurturing and fun. I remember it seemed timeless as we would put puzzles together, play cards, or wash little rocks in the sunshine to see them sparkle. It was quiet and inclusive, unlike being at home which felt tense and out of control.
Somehow, I am sure my mothering sprang from many variables and was a combination of different experiences throughout my life. As I look back today, I only have a fuzzy perspective on how fast the time flew by and how we got to now. My son is thirty-two and lives in another state so we have to depend on phones, email, scype and carefully planned visits to stay in touch.
What I appreciate most about our communication is it's honesty and caring. I see in him a person who is sensitive, creative, cares about other people and his work or whatever he is doing, and has the ability to be totally present and in the moment. He is truly a wonderful man. (You might feel I'm biased but I'm trying to be objective in my subjectivity!) He has a very full life, having become a father this year. His values around parenting are interesting to see and are clearly reflected in the quality of involvement he has with his daughter and wife, which is so sweet to see and be around.
I like him. Not only because he is my son, but because of who he is as a person. We talked on the phone over the weekend. He was positive and supportive about my life and the projects I'm involved in. I was able to ask him for some reflection and he took the time to give me input as well as relating it to his own experiences and journey. The honesty was astounding.
Being the parent of an adult child is delightful to me. I am so grateful that I am a Mom and a Granny. The relationship I have with my son is healthy, giving, and nurturing. It is all of the things I had hoped for when he was growing up. I feel very blessed to have this story to tell.
