My friends live in many different places in the world. My appreciation of them is beyond words. Each of them brings out or reminds me of a different aspect of myself. I find this very exhilarating. Let me give you some examples.
Recently I spoke on the phone with one of my friends and we talked about my mask-making. We explored how I chose what I was going to make. This conversation expanded to include spirit guides, totems, psychological inner work, archetypes, mythological beings and instincts and personal growth. I found that after the conversation was over I kept thinking about it and continued to compound the thoughts discussed in our conversation with more and more creativity. It was, to say the least, stimulating.
Another conversation with a different friend focused on their recent move to a new part of the country and the challenges that presented. Since I am familiar with these kinds of moves it was good for me to talk about it. It brought up a lot of things for me. We spoke of the importance of a personal support system. This included reaching out to friends in different places when you make a move to help stabilize and emotionally support the move and lack of friends in the new place. This helps with the tendency to withdraw and isolate that both of us tend to do in these situations.
One of my friends, who knows me really well, wanted to talk with me about her depression. Since this is a topic that I am intimately familiar with I was open and willing to discuss it at length. We began by talking about the symptoms and difficulties and ended the conversation in a much lighter place, seeing depression as a teacher and viewing its challenges to take gentle care of ourselves as a positive reminder in our lives.
One of my friends just makes me laugh. Talking with her is so upbeat that, no matter how blue I feel before we talk, I end up feeling good. I can even laugh at myself without beating myself up--something that is very hard for me to do on my own volition. When she and I talk, I am brought much closer to the joy in my life and I feel expansive and empowered.
Another friend spends a lot of her time and energy caring for her grandchildren. She has dedicated herself completely to taking care of them with the consciousness of equally caring for herself and her own needs. There is no martyrdom or codependency present in her choices. When we talk, I am reminded of how easy it is for me to give myself up for someone else or some thing that has my attention and not take care of myself. She is an excellent reminder of what it looks like to be healthy in relationship to other people and things in life.
One friend and I have lengthy conversations about spirituality. We discuss philosophical notions and psychological ramifications. Our talks take us out of the ordinary and catapult us into magical realms that attract us both. Delving into the mysteries of life creates an expansiveness that is difficult to explain. It is at the same time exhilarating and greatly satisfying.
Then there are those friends who are plain old emotional support. The gift of these friends is in the knowing that we are always there for each other. The level of trust this requires on both sides is both enormous and wonderful. There is no doubt that they will be there at any time and for any reason. I am blessed to have so many of these friends in my life.
I am feeling very grateful writing this piece. How lucky I am to be blessed with such amazing, interesting and insightful friends! How appreciative I am to them that we can be present to each other at our best and at our worst. How glad I am that I have the capacity to be open to loving people. No matter how far I am away from my friends physically, I carry them all close in my heart. When I think of them I find myself smiling.
