I'm going to be a Grandmother. My son and his wife are having a baby girl in March. I've never thought about what it would be like to be a Grandmother, but now I am getting excited!
My own grandmother (my mother's mother) was not very accessible. She was pretty shut down around us kids and never related one on one. Even when I worked alone with her in her gardens she didn't say much. She just mostly told me when I had done something wrong. She wasn't a very good model of what I imagined a Grandmother could be.
Her older sister, my great aunt Leonie, was much more what I wanted. She was always happy to see me and would drop everything to be with me. We would cook together, I would watch her wash her hair, we would peel apples to see how much we could keep together before breaking the chain, we sat on her porch swing and sang songs, we took little buckets of water and sat in her driveway washing little rocks and seeing them sparkle.
It didn't seem to matter if I was alone with her or if my other siblings or neighborhood kids were there. I still felt totally loved and accepted. When other kids were around we would put puzzles together, play solitaire, and when her cuckoo clock was about to chime we would all run in and watch the little people come out to tell the time.
My own mother was a wonderful Grandmother. She seemed to transform into another person around her grandchildren. While she was a difficult and complicated Mother, she was fun, connected and mesmerizing as a Grandmother. Her grandchildren adored her until her untimely death when the oldest grandchild was 7.
I have been watching my sister closely with her 2 year old granddaughter. She is great with her. She has the patience of a saint, gets down and plays, snuggles while reading books and generally is so loving it's awesome to be around.
All my friends who have grandchildren say it is the BEST! The love for their grand babies seems to be totally unconditional. They say you don't discipline them the same way you did your own children because it isn't your job. You can just love and enjoy the kids. And then, there is always that knowing that they will be going home to their own parents.
I don't know how I'll do as a Grandmother. I don't live in the vicinity of my son, so that makes it more difficult to be a constant in his child's life. I want to be everything all of my good models have shown me. I want to be loving, fun, steady and dependable, delighted, present and compassionate. I think those things will just come naturally as it is how I feel.
I cannot express my joy at becoming a Grandmother. I think I can make a good one. I know as each month passes and it gets closer and closer to the birth, my excitement grows. I cannot wait to hold her and watch my son and his wife as parents. They are going to be great parents. I want to be a wonderful Grandmother. The odds are good.
